The news — and the world — feel heavy this week, and we are holding each of you in our hearts. I know our community is very new, but right from the start we want this Midstory Magazine to be a space (outside of social media) for midlife women to discuss how we’re feeling — not only about our writing lives but anything else that is on our minds. How are you doing this week? What’s on your mind? Are you writing?
I’m not doing great. Horrified and saddened and frightened by what’s going on in the world, and annoyed that all the shit that always annoys me is still annoying me in the face of real, serious horror. I feel like I want to run away even though there’s no place to run to. My greatest joy right now is that I can get through a crazy allergy attack without peeing a little every time I sneeze. That defines tiny win, I guess.
It's impossible to flip the switch on our regular microcrises and irritations when larger tragedies take center stage, and we need to give ourselves grace for still being human. And yes, let's take all the tiny wins we can.
Raises hand to say I’m struggling as well. I’m weary of watching war crimes happen without consequence. Trying to be there for my friends who have family in Ukraine and Israel.
I may free write about this for Monday, but I’m also bummed to be back in the US. First world problem. Won’t say much more about it. My heart isn’t here, and I’m taking a big old dose of “happiness is what I am inside.”
Oct 10, 2023Liked by Jessica Smock, Steph Sprenger
If good writing is good thinking -- and I believe it is -- I'm either not thinking well or I'm not writing well. Or both. I'm pulled and aching. I'm looking for crannies to fold up in for a few moments, to process the world, to think and figure out. The world doesn't seem to like to grant that to midlife women.
On the upside, this month I can purchase Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in bulk without much eyebrow raising from my dear grocery checkout person.
Sometimes good writing comes from unclear thinking, don't you think? And, yes, I completely agree that we (midlife women) need these crannies to make sense of all that is going on, both inside our little worlds and beyond it.
And yes here's to the month when I can buy bulk candy without an eyebrow raise!
Oct 10, 2023Liked by Jessica Smock, Steph Sprenger
I'm feeling really fearful. And my heart is so heavy -- like I'm carrying around an additional, elephant-sized burden. I haven't been able to write anything new these last couple of days, but I also know how important writing is to my soul. So I'm using this time to work on revisions.
I think it's important to know when our hearts/minds can't handle creating and focusing on revisions is the better choice. The fear and sadness and anger is a very real burden.
Oct 11, 2023Liked by Jessica Smock, Steph Sprenger
I’m writing, a little. I’m trying to pay just enough attention to the news to get by, but not too much. The world is a lot right now, everything seems horrible, and I completely understand news fatigue.
Oct 11, 2023Liked by Jessica Smock, Steph Sprenger
Writing from Israel here...my immediate family is all safe but we personally know dozens of families who have lost loved ones. Our close friends' son is one of the captives in Gaza, in need of urgent medical care. My 2 sons are in the army, but at bases that are relatively safe. Multiple friends who have kids serving in the thick of things. Can't work. Can't write. Can't sleep. Trying to volunteer wherever we can - my daughters are making sandwiches, care packages, offering free babysitting, etc. Spent 3 1/2 hours yesterday in long lines to donate blood...We are all devastated. :-(
Here's one proactive, concrete thing people can do to help: write to your Senators and ask them to work around the clock to free hostages being held in Gaza. Mention that some hold US citizenship. In particular Hersh Goldberg-Polin, in need of urgent medical attention. We want them all released, but every little bit helps. Here are my friends on CNN yesterday: https://www.cnn.com/videos/world/2023/10/10/exp-israel-missing-son-goldberg-polin-101007aseg1-cnn-world.cnn
Thank you so much for sharing. I'm glad your family is safe, but I'm so deeply sorry for the losses throughout your community. Thank you as well for giving us practical suggestions for how we in the US can do to help.
Julie, thank you so much. This is so important for our community to hear. It can feel "far away," even though many of us know people directly impacted, and regardless of whether in touches someone's life directly, we need to have some action items to avoid helplessness leading to paralysis. Sending love and compassion to your family and community.
Oct 11, 2023Liked by Jessica Smock, Steph Sprenger
Hearing about & seeing one of the strongest militaries in the world decimate families, children and not be able to stop it, feels very wrong. But that's how the world feels these days. Just wrong.
Oct 11, 2023·edited Oct 11, 2023Liked by Jessica Smock
I've been heartbroken over the
conflict, as I was with the Ukrainian invasion, and and and and.....
So I intentionally take in news in small doses. I feel the story, then I compartmentalize so I don't collapse into despair. As I handle all tragedies where I can't make a damn bit of difference.
I've been in a state of chronic outrage and heartbreak since 2015. As an activist and social commentary blogger, I absorb too much sometimes. Injustice chronically inhabits my head. Religion that harms the LGBTQ community, has been my latest rumination.
As for writing, blogging yes, to pour out my outrage and empathy. But for personal essays, I'm working a piece and simultaneously avoiding, per my now pathological procrastination to submit. And probably to avoid entering the feeling place necessary to write, well.
It was so great to hear from you this morning--both here and via email, thank you! I absolutely relate to the challenge with absorbing too much. It's wonderful to see you here, Laura. ❤️
I can't process any of this without also the lens of being a mother, particularly with sons old enough to understand what is going on. But it feels like the news is *always* hard to share with kids. I have been grateful for reliable sources who provide thoughtful guidance on how to discuss/share with kids, at least.
I’m not doing great. Horrified and saddened and frightened by what’s going on in the world, and annoyed that all the shit that always annoys me is still annoying me in the face of real, serious horror. I feel like I want to run away even though there’s no place to run to. My greatest joy right now is that I can get through a crazy allergy attack without peeing a little every time I sneeze. That defines tiny win, I guess.
Right here with you, Cara.
And no pee sneezes are always a win.
Oh, trust me. You're not alone. All the regular stupid stuff still annoys me just as much as it normally does.
It's impossible to flip the switch on our regular microcrises and irritations when larger tragedies take center stage, and we need to give ourselves grace for still being human. And yes, let's take all the tiny wins we can.
Raises hand to say I’m struggling as well. I’m weary of watching war crimes happen without consequence. Trying to be there for my friends who have family in Ukraine and Israel.
I may free write about this for Monday, but I’m also bummed to be back in the US. First world problem. Won’t say much more about it. My heart isn’t here, and I’m taking a big old dose of “happiness is what I am inside.”
It must be hard to feel like your heart isn't here. Sending love.
Sending you love, my friend.
If good writing is good thinking -- and I believe it is -- I'm either not thinking well or I'm not writing well. Or both. I'm pulled and aching. I'm looking for crannies to fold up in for a few moments, to process the world, to think and figure out. The world doesn't seem to like to grant that to midlife women.
On the upside, this month I can purchase Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in bulk without much eyebrow raising from my dear grocery checkout person.
Sometimes good writing comes from unclear thinking, don't you think? And, yes, I completely agree that we (midlife women) need these crannies to make sense of all that is going on, both inside our little worlds and beyond it.
And yes here's to the month when I can buy bulk candy without an eyebrow raise!
Some of my best writing comes from unclear thinking, or what I think is my chronic ambivalence as a messy human.
Jackie, I always love your trademark humor infusions into the heaviness of real life. Pulled and aching--that is so well put.
I'm feeling really fearful. And my heart is so heavy -- like I'm carrying around an additional, elephant-sized burden. I haven't been able to write anything new these last couple of days, but I also know how important writing is to my soul. So I'm using this time to work on revisions.
I hope you're able to get back to writing soon, and that you do find that it helps.
I think it's important to know when our hearts/minds can't handle creating and focusing on revisions is the better choice. The fear and sadness and anger is a very real burden.
I’m writing, a little. I’m trying to pay just enough attention to the news to get by, but not too much. The world is a lot right now, everything seems horrible, and I completely understand news fatigue.
Writing from Israel here...my immediate family is all safe but we personally know dozens of families who have lost loved ones. Our close friends' son is one of the captives in Gaza, in need of urgent medical care. My 2 sons are in the army, but at bases that are relatively safe. Multiple friends who have kids serving in the thick of things. Can't work. Can't write. Can't sleep. Trying to volunteer wherever we can - my daughters are making sandwiches, care packages, offering free babysitting, etc. Spent 3 1/2 hours yesterday in long lines to donate blood...We are all devastated. :-(
Here's one proactive, concrete thing people can do to help: write to your Senators and ask them to work around the clock to free hostages being held in Gaza. Mention that some hold US citizenship. In particular Hersh Goldberg-Polin, in need of urgent medical attention. We want them all released, but every little bit helps. Here are my friends on CNN yesterday: https://www.cnn.com/videos/world/2023/10/10/exp-israel-missing-son-goldberg-polin-101007aseg1-cnn-world.cnn
Thank you so much for sharing. I'm glad your family is safe, but I'm so deeply sorry for the losses throughout your community. Thank you as well for giving us practical suggestions for how we in the US can do to help.
Julie, thank you so much. This is so important for our community to hear. It can feel "far away," even though many of us know people directly impacted, and regardless of whether in touches someone's life directly, we need to have some action items to avoid helplessness leading to paralysis. Sending love and compassion to your family and community.
Hearing about & seeing one of the strongest militaries in the world decimate families, children and not be able to stop it, feels very wrong. But that's how the world feels these days. Just wrong.
You're right. All of it feels so very wrong.
I've been heartbroken over the
conflict, as I was with the Ukrainian invasion, and and and and.....
So I intentionally take in news in small doses. I feel the story, then I compartmentalize so I don't collapse into despair. As I handle all tragedies where I can't make a damn bit of difference.
I've been in a state of chronic outrage and heartbreak since 2015. As an activist and social commentary blogger, I absorb too much sometimes. Injustice chronically inhabits my head. Religion that harms the LGBTQ community, has been my latest rumination.
As for writing, blogging yes, to pour out my outrage and empathy. But for personal essays, I'm working a piece and simultaneously avoiding, per my now pathological procrastination to submit. And probably to avoid entering the feeling place necessary to write, well.
I try to take the news "in small doses" as well. Sometimes I fail at that, but I think it's a crucial goal.
It was so great to hear from you this morning--both here and via email, thank you! I absolutely relate to the challenge with absorbing too much. It's wonderful to see you here, Laura. ❤️
I can't process any of this without also the lens of being a mother, particularly with sons old enough to understand what is going on. But it feels like the news is *always* hard to share with kids. I have been grateful for reliable sources who provide thoughtful guidance on how to discuss/share with kids, at least.
Hi, Allison! What are the reliable sources you'd recommend for parents on this issue?