20 Comments
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Wendy's avatar

This was really, really lovely. Thank you for sharing it.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you so much ❤️

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Victoria's avatar

A beautiful bittersweet share and reconciliation; a gift. Thanks, Alice & Midstory.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you, Victoria. I appreciate all you share to make this new journey we're on a little easier xox

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Victoria's avatar

xoxo Thanks Alice, I need to - for me too. As Emily Kenway said, 'When you have the knowledge and feel the pain, it feels like a moral obligation to help and warn others about it!'

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

That's a beautiful comment and motivation. Thank you again xoxox

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Pilar Guerrero's avatar

Dear Alice, your story reminded me about a time with my mother just a few years ago, and it has helped me realize I've grown more than I give myself credit for. Your descriptions of trivial moments that take us into distances we just can't traverse feel universal to me. I have felt that way, I have believed it was about me, and I have had a similar feeling for a long time.

I appreciate your story and your courage to tell it.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you. The moment beside the cherry bushes stays with me--there's regret and the understanding I can't change it. I love that you took time to share your words here with me. I feel that connection, and realise that when I write honestly and deeply, I get to know myself in a new way. Each time. I'm glad that helps you travel those distances, too.

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Kim O'Donnel's avatar

Gorgeous stitchery. The sour cherries bit just perfect. Thank you.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thanks so much. Every time I taste one, I’m right back there x

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Joyce Gerber's avatar

This beautiful and moving essay was bittersweet to its core, thank you Alice for sharing your insights, sadness and vulnerability.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you so much, Joyce. My mother-in-law moved in with us a few weeks ago now and that shifts the perspective, too. Family is complicated...

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Dina Alvarez's avatar

Thank you for sharing these very private moments with us. A beautiful and thoughtful essay. I am guessing it made many of us think about our personal losses and experiences at the moment and also gives others insight into moments like these.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you so much for taking time to write this for me. It was a complicated time and a complicated essay to work on. I’m glad it resonated xoxox

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Mary Carter's avatar

I married into a farm family and my relationship with my father-in-law is also difficult. Our house and farm is in my husband's name--not mine--a convention used by many older farmers (in the U.S.). I appreciate the difficulties in writing about these things.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

I think about this a lot. My mother-in-law is living with us now as no plan was made. And I try to sit with that, and what I've lost, and what she has, and the messy love of it all... Thanks for taking time to comment xox

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Mary Carter's avatar

God will bless you, and enfold you. I wonder how many women--even in 2024--are out there in similar straits.

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

I imagine many… Thank you ❤️

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Vickie's avatar

I cried as I read your words. Your relationship with him reminded me of a similar relationship with my sister who I tried to manage all sorts of feelings long distance due to COVID. She didn't die of COVID but I couldn't travel to try to help due to COVID Thank you for your well written words capturing so much!

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Alice Kuipers's avatar

Thank you, Vickie. My relationship with him lingers still in my heart and mind. His wife lives with us now, and his photo is in her bedroom, looking over (it feels like), which brings up a lot of feeling. Thank you for sharing this with me, today.

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